It's been 7 months since we became a couple. It was kind of unexpected because we weren't even friends back in high school, which i regret because i didn't get the chance to see how amazing he really is. I can be myself when i'm with him and there's no point in ranting about the past because he's with me now. And I'm not gonna let him go. No matter what.
Our first couple of months were a bit of a struggle as i had a hard time adjusting; I guess i wasn't used to be in a relationship anymore. I was single for more than two years and being committed kind of overwhelmed me. I must admit, I used to miss my old life, i missed doing whatever i want without asking permission, i missed doing things i'm happy about with no limit, go anywhere without worrying and go out with friends wherever, whenever. I was free and i loved it. But things are different now. I have a lot, yes, a lot to consider. I learned to compromise.
It came to a point where I actually started asking myself if all the sacrifices were worth it. I did everything i can to meet his expectations and be the right girl for him.The last thing i want is to have a fight with him because pain kills me like hell. With that, i did my best to make things work... night out with friends and out of town trips were lessened, social network overhaul and some of the activities i love doing are now limited. But i just simply didn't care, why? because i love him so much and i am willing to do anything to make him happy. And maybe because i was busy trying so hard to be the best girlfriend in the solar system, it took me months to finally realize that something's gradually receding: myself.
And my biggest mistake was, i didnt let him know what i was feeling; i just kept it to myself, which is really, really stupid.
You might think I'm in a crappy relationship but I'm not. This may be hard to believe but this relationship is one of the best things that ever happened to me. I learned so much and i still am learning. I couldn't believe that those months of questions and doubts were just selfishness and immaturity. Communication is the key. I gathered my courage to talk to him. I want him to help me understand why he's treating me like a kid; as if my brain's malfunctioned and i can't take care of myself. He gave me the explanation that i asked for and i finally understood that:
- I am no longer single so i should stop acting like one.
- I can still do whatever i want just as long as i know my limitations
- I can still go wherever i wanna go (with his consent of course) as long as i take care of myself for him not to worry
- I earned his trust and we can always meet halfway to make everything work.
It's now our seventh and we're still counting.I started to embrace our situation now and i kissed my single life goodbye. everything is now in the right track and we hardly fight anymore. I know we still have a lot to go through but with love, trust, loyalty and friendship, together, we can surpass all the trials.
